Getting Back On The Horse

Do you know how I got such nice skin? Through the repeated application of seemingly futile effort. - Faye Valentine

One of the continual frustrations of this experiment is self-determination is the fact that one sets a million tiny goals, all of which seem entirely achievable, but are insurmountable taken as a whole.

I can read books, meditate, cook, clean house. I'm doing more of these things than ever; I just can't do them all at the same time. As I spin one plate, another comes crashing to the floor; I am running about three miles a day, but my kitchen floor is a mess. Reading more books (for pleasure and not research), in particular, seems to be a continually neglected task, although I've read more books than I have in years.

These small failures of mine are not an occasion for despair. After all, the cost of resuming a failed endeavor is very small. In fact, it's so small that it's actually much costlier to procrastinate and self-flagellate than it is to simply and immediately try again. Most endeavors are unlike winning the Superbowl, in that one can sustain countless abortive failures and still accomplish the task. Small steps seem futile, but they will cover the ground just as surely as a large one.

So I've learned to keep moving. And slowly but surely, the work is done.